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This Halloween, Don't Be a Sexy Goldfish

This year, a new sexy costume started trending: the sexy goldfish. But if you're going go as a sexy marine creature, there are so many better ones out there to choose from.


Everyone wants to be a sexy something for Halloween. Whether it's a sexy firefighter or a sexy whisk, Halloween costume-makers have never failed to think of a sexy twist on everything from common occupations to little-thought-of inanimate objects. But this year, a new sexy costume started trending. Everyone meet the sexy goldfish.


sexy goldfish costumeThe sexy goldfish in all her ... glory? (Credit: Yandy.com)

Now, we're not against embracing the allure of your body, the distracting image of a woman dressed as a common household pet or reckless invasive freshwater species. We just think you could do a lot better.

If you're going to break the boundaries across species and go as a sexy marine creature, there are so many better ones out there to choose from. So without any further ado, here's our list of the best sexy sea creature costumes that will show off your passion for all things marine.


Sexy Blobfish

Of course we had to lead with this. Everyone knows the familiar, gloomy face of the world's ugliest animal. So why not make it sexy? Because nothing makes a flabby pile of pasty-pink gelatinous flesh more fun than adding some fishnets, or maybe a wig.

Just because blobfish live in the deep sea and are primarily composed of bulbous, highly compressed gelatin doesn't mean they can't have fun, too.


Sexy Oarfish

sexy goldfish costumeJust look at those frills! (Credit: Flickr/Biodiversity Heritage Library)

While we're in the deep sea, why stop at blobfish? The oarfish has the longest body length of any bony fish (and that's not the only thing that's long — just check out its towering dorsal fin rays.)

The oarfish is also extremely gelatinous, making it the perfect costume for anyone who's lost their beach body and gained a layer of winter fat.


Sexy Squidworm

Never heard of the squid worm before? That's no problem; we'll break it down. A squid worm is loosely defined as a deep-sea, free-swimming worm that feeds on sinking fecal matter and fish mucus that is most notable for the tentacles literally growing out of its head.

Sounds sexy, right? Just pop on a bikini top and some tentacular appendages and you can eat people's boogers at the party all night long.


Sexy Sea Angel

You can see right inside it! (Credit: Wikimedia Commons)

Nothing's sexier than a shirt you can see right through, so this Halloween, lean into transparency and be a sexy sea angel, those semi-translucent swimming sea slugs that flap aimlessly in polar waters near and far.

All you need to do is put on a wet T-shirt, a clip-on halo and a fuzzy pair of angel wings. And if you're lucky, maybe your best friend will go as a sea devil (that's a hagfish).


Sexy Marrus Orthocanna

sexy goldfish costumeIt's got a great set of gams! (Credit: Wikimedia Commons)

If you're like us, nothing's sexier than working together. So let the inner socialist in you rejoice and dress up as Marrus orthocanna, a species of pelagic siphonophore that looks like one larger animal but is actually a colonial animal comprising thousands of tiny zooids working together for a common cause. It's a great group costume.


Sexy Yeti Crab

sexy goldfish costumeNot shaving is super sexy right now. (Credit: Oregon State University)

Hairy legs, huge pincers and near-complete blindness — need we say more? The yeti crab is one of the more mysterious (and therefore alluring!) deep-sea crustaceans that lights all the other deep-sea crustaceans' hearts aflutter.

Don't shave for a few weeks and pinch people whenever they ask you what your costume is.

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