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Zafar the Dolphin Is So Horny He's Scaring French Beachgoers

This dolphin needs to get laid.


Zafar the dolphin needs to get laid.

If it doesn't happen soon, the dolphin is going to keep terrorizing tourists and swimmers in the seaside town in Brittany. At first, beachgoers delighted in Zafar's playful antics as he leapt around the coast of Landévennec, playing with him as he would frolic near boats and swim with humans.

But lately, Zafar has turned too aggressive to be around beachgoers. The reason?

He's in what onlookers have called a "state of arousal," and he's trying to do something to end that state, pronto.

zafar the dolphin

Giphy

In an oceanic display of toxic masculinity, Zafar has taken to rubbing up against kayaks and boats, and even used his nose to lift a woman out of the water.

zafar the dolphin Giphy

He's become so aggressive that the mayor of Landévennec has issued a swimming ban when Zafar is nearby, and ordered beachgoers not to come within 50 meters of the dolphin.

It's not the first time that a sexually frustrated dolphin has made headlines. The animals are notoriously frisky. Decades ago, one dolphin researcher lived with a bottlenose dolphin for a NASA-funded project to attempt to learn more about dolphin communication.

Unfortunately, Margaret Lovatt became known not for her breakthroughs in dolphin language, but because she would routinely assist her research subject in working through his sexual frustration.

"Saturday Night Live" made a sketch based on the experience.


Zafar's reign of boner terror probably won't end in a similar way. In fact, the swimming ban has its naysayers, who note that while Zafar's aggression might be alarming, it likely won't lead to an attack that would harm any humans.

Hopefully, Zafar will soon find a willing partner somewhere out at sea, and let the tourists of Brittany get back to their arousal-free swimming.

zafar the dolphin

Giphy

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